Billy Crystal Quotes
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The Passion of the Christ opened up on Ash Wednesday, had a Good Friday.
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There's only, I think, in life, three things that I do pretty well: Performing, I still can field ground balls, and I make nice kids.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I'd always go off book and start improvising.
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[My mother] is the greatest hero I'll ever know because she kept us all together, she made sure we all graduated college. She always believed in us no matter what we do. My older brother Joel became an art teacher; my brother Rip ultimately became a television producer and singer and actor himself.
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[I did impressions] of relatives because I heard so many different sounds. My dad was in the music business and of course my uncle was a giant [music producer], but my dad in particular had the house filled with these Dixieland jazz stars.
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My grandparents invented joylessness. They were not fun. I've already had more fun with my grandchildren than my grandparents ever had with me.
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I have 40-something intros [that Davis Jr. did]; all are different, none of them happened. And it was hilarious.
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If you do something for the first time, you will always remember it. If your Dad has something to do with it, you write about it.
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I'd like to think there is a Heaven, and it starts from the happiest day in your life.
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The inspiration was this great group of 40 or 50 relatives, sometimes for Thanksgiving or Passover or something and my brothers would just go up and make them laugh.
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I'm comfortable being old... being black... being Jewish.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck's puff pastries.
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When comedy is good, it's jazz. The beats of it, the looseness, the improvisational part, the music-the way you hit the inflection, the high notes of a joke. It's all melody to me.
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Every time I was with Sammy [Davis Jr.] it was like going to the show business museum because the stories were so extraordinary, and I didn't care if they were true or not after a while. ... I don't know if he really got high with Humphrey Bogart or not. It didn't matter because he was painting these fantastic pictures.
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I was a film-directing major at NYU. I'm still not sure why I became a directing major, when I was really an actor and a comedian, but there was something that drew me to doing that.
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My granddaughter's birth has made me want to create things she will love.
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I didn't rebel as a child. I missed that angry teenager thing.
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I think when I feel I'm at my best is when I'm on stage, and it's my version of jazz because it's just riffing or something.
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I can't be funny if my feet don't feel right.
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Did you ever reach a point in your life, where you say to yourself, 'This is the best I'm ever going to look, the best I'm ever going to feel, the best I'm ever going to do,' and it ain't that great?
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Gentlemen, start your egos!
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I had a dream that Connie Chung is doing a newscast about my death and they show a clip from Soap.
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I'm a sucker for a free tuxedo.
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Consider the rose...The rose is the sweetest smelling flower of all, and it's the most beautiful because it's the most simple, right? But sometimes, you got to clip the rose. You got to cut the rose back, so something sweeter smelling and stronger, and even more beautiful, will grow in its place
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You really have to have some muscle to be on the stage in front of the world.
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When we had the girls, my daughter Jenny gave us like a Bible from my daughter of, "Don't feed them this; don't feed them that, if she says this, don't say that," It was crazy!
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Despite what The Wall Street Journal says, our awards are the best-kept secret in America, with the possible exception of what George W. Bush did in the '70s.
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Since I was a kid, every Thanksgiving growing up in New York, we always watched 'The March of the Wooden Soldiers' by Laurel and Hardy. Never miss it.
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Those are all real things that I experienced, not with [my daughters] growing up but with the, you know - I'm trying not to step into something and get a call, "Dad why'd you say that?"! But we'd go to games [where score wasn't kept], and I'd get it, but I wouldn't get it, because I think there's a real value in winners and losers, in not everybody getting a trophy - it makes you work hard, you appreciate what it takes, to say, "Why didn't we win?" You shouldn't be condemned for losing.
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Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
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