Dorothy Parker Quotes
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...as for helping me in the outside world, the Convent taught me only that if you spit on a pencil eraser, it will erase ink.
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Scratch an actor and you'll find an actress.
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Once I was coming down a street in Beverly Hills and I saw a Cadillac about a block long, and out of the side window was a wonderfully slinky mink, and an arm, and at the end of the arm a hand in a white suede glove wrinkled around the wrist, and in the hand was a bagel with a bite out of it.
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The ones I like are ‘cheque’ and ‘enclosed.’
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Go to the Martin Beck Theatre and watch Katherine Hepburn run the gamut of emotions from A to B.
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A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.
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If, with the literate, I am Impelled to try an epigram, I never seek to take the credit; We all assume that Oscar said it.
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
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Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing. Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.
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Lady, lady, never start Conversation toward your heart; Keep your pretty words serene; Never murmur what you mean. Show yourself, by word and look, Swift and shallow as a brook. Be as cool and quick to go As a drop of April snow; Be as delicate and gay As a cherry flower in May. Lady, lady, never speak Of the tears that burn your cheek- She will never win him, whose Words had shown she feared to lose. Be you wise and never sad, You will get your lovely lad. Never serious be, nor true, And your wish will come to you- And if that makes you happy, kid, You'll be the first it ever did.
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We were all imitative. We all wandered in after Miss Edna St. Vincent Millay. We were all being dashing and gallant, declaring we weren't virgins, whether we were or not.
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It's easier to write about those you hate — just as it's easier to criticize a bad play or a bad book.
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She will never win him, whose words had shown she feared to lose.
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This living, this living, this living Was never a project of mine.
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[Completely bored by a country weekend, wiring to a friend:] For heaven's sake, rush me a loaf of bread, enclosing saw and file.
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There was always something immensely comic to her in the thought of living elsewhere than New York. She could not regard as serious proposals that she share a western residence.
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Hold your pen and spare your voice.
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I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
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Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
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[Hospitalized and pressing the nurse's button before dictating letters to her secretary:] This should assure us of at least forty-five minutes of undisturbed privacy.
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I give her sadness and the gift of pain, a new moon madness and a love of rain.
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Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
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Said of her husband on the day their divorce became final: Oh, don't worry about Alan. . . . Alan will always land on somebody's feet.
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If wild my breast and sore my pride, I bask in dreams of suicide, If cool my heart and high my head I think 'How lucky are the dead.
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Now that you've got me right down to it, the only thing I didn't like about The Barrets of Wimplole Street was the play.
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The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
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all men are the same age.
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What writes worse than a Theodore Dreiser? ... Two Theodore Dreisers.
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