Graham Norton Quotes
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Britain's such a twisted, weird little place.
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Occasionally the state of the planet can knock me off my perky perch.
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A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.
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I don't think anyone wants to be gay.
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I always say I'd rather be miserable by myself than unhappy in a relationship.
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Forty freaked me out. I didn't see it coming. My life was in a state of chaos - I was moving jobs and moving house - and it just hit me like a ton of bricks.
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I'm often dating people, but I don't say it because you sort of know it won't last long.
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I do get pleasure from very inconsequential things, like shopping for clothes.
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Tolerance is forced on people in London.
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Straight men just can't imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do.
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In my experience the difference between a straight and a bisexual is about four pints
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I think the word is adult!
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Where I get bored is when I show up for a shoot and they want me to wear a feather boa. Too obvious a thing for a poof on the telly to do.
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It's lovely to get one successful show - the chances of finding a second one are not so hot.
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I've so exceeded what I ever wanted to do.
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Some people think they're depressed and they go to the doctor and want pills. And you just think: 'You hate where you live, you've lost your job, your boyfriend has dumped you, could all this be why you're depressed?'
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I'd like to retire at 50 but I don't want to sell papers in the middle of London on a Zimmer.
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All my interesting stories are from before I was on television. Nothing interesting has happened to me since then. Maybe it's because the most interesting thing in my life is the show and that's on telly.
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An awful lot of female celebrities are very beautiful whereas a lot of male celebrities are not so hot.
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I've heard other gay people say when they were growing up they felt 'foreign.' Growing up, I was able to label these feelings as: 'I'm a Protestant.' It wasn't until I left, I thought: 'Oh, those weren't Protestant feelings.'
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Basically, I'm a really bad interviewer. I love meeting celebrities, but then I get a bit bored. Once you meet them you thing, 'really, what an ordinary person'.
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I was a failed actor but I still wanted to show off, so I ended up doing live comedy.
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My life could have been so grim really, really grim.
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The only time I took Ecstacy was years and years ago. It was absolutely amazing.
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I loved Lucille Ball growing up.
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I have nothing to say about my childhood. It was a perfectly pleasant upbringing - it's not like it was unhappy or anything.
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I don't think I've got bad taste. I've got no taste.
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It sounds deeply shallow, but for brief spells every member of the public can be fascinating.
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You don't want money to make you a social freak where you can only hang out with rich people.
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I am very quick to judge.
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