Jack Dee Quotes
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The rain forest has Sting. Now Siberia has Jack Dee. Someone had to draw the short straw. In this case it was the rain forest.
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Whenever you're in any acting role you are mortgaging your own character.
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I tend not to trust people who live in very tidy houses. I know that on the surface there is nothing wrong with a person being well-ordered and disciplined. Nothing, except that it leaves the impression of that person having lived in the confines of a stark institution which, although he or she has long since left, remains within.
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I hate people who think it's clever to take drugs... like custom officers.
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I love mixing with comedians when I'm working with them, but when I'm not I don't feel the need to hang around with them.
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I spent the first 25 years of my life not knowing what I wanted to do.
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I really like rustic mediterranean cooking. And I like trying out curry takeaways.
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Well, I don't ever get excited. I haven't been excited since I got a Chopper bicycle when I was about 12. Once you get older you realise there's always a catch to everything. So when I get, say, a commission to make a TV show, the catch is that you have to deliver something and then the sense of responsibility overwhelms the joy of the occasion.
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But I like going to church. If you've been brought up in the Church of England, it feels like visiting an elderly relative. And I think it's important that part of the kids' education is knowing about the Bible.
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In particular, I found praying very disturbing, like swimming with bricks tied to your feet. And yet I was drawn to it constantly.
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I was on various anti-depressants, but not for long - I didn't function very well on them. I felt sort of flattened out.
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They call it 'surfing' the net. It's not surfing. It's typing in your bedroom
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My character, Rick Spleen, is a what-if version of me, really, where nothing did quite turn out right and everything else is still around the corner.
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Mmmm... the comedy that matters is the comedy you pull out of thin air. It's a bit like when something funny has happened and you try to explain it to someone else and end up saying, 'You had to be there'.
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One of my friends went on a murder weekend, now he is doing life for it.
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Make lots of money. Enjoy the work. Operate within the law. Choose any two of three
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I really hated fighting people and hurting them, but felt unable to stop.
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I'm not really part of any group or clique or gang because that's always been my nature.
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If I've inadvertently become some sort of role model for failed comedians, then it's really backfired very badly on me.
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One Saturday in 1984, I walked into my first AA meeting. I went regularly for six years and only stopped when I came to realize my underlying problem was not genuine alcoholism, but depression.
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The film industry is like Anne Robinsonalways on the look-out for a new face
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Comedy and tragedy are two sides of the same coin. A talent in one area might also lead to a predisposition in the other.
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In my local newspaper, they had this advert: 'please look after your neighbours in the cold weather'. I live next door to this 84-year-old woman, and do you know, not once has she come round to see if I'm all right. The lazy cow hasn't even taken her milk in for a fortnight.
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I had a longing for ritual, something I could cling to, a routine to make me feel well and contented. I hoped that reading Bible commentaries and theological critiques would nudge me closer to some kind of absolute that I could hold up as a torch to light my way.
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In many ways, not fitting in has been a comedic asset and a comedic resource.
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And people are intrigued if I really am as grumpy in real life. People feel a bit let down if I'm laughing or smiling.
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I was so keen to become a comedian that actually doing the comedy itself almost came second.
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I have had issues with depression all my life, and it's probably true to say there was a tendency towards it even when I was very young, during my schooldays. There was often - and this is quite common with comics - a sense of not feeling as if I belonged anywhere.
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I don't like men who blow-dry their hair. If you are a man and you blow-dry your hair, then I don't like you and that's all there is to it.
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People who are pro smacking children say, 'It's the only language they understand.' You could apply that to tourists.
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