Katharine Whitehorn Quotes
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I am all for people having their heart in the right place; but the right place for a heart is not inside the head.
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When it comes to housework the one thing no book of household management can ever tell you is how to begin. Or maybe I mean why.
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Perennials are the ones that grow like weeds, biennials are the ones that die this year instead of next and hardy annuals are the ones that never come up at all.
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I blame Rousseau, myself. "Man is born free", indeed. Man is not born free, he is born attached to his mother by a cord and is not capable of looking after himself for at least seven years (seventy in some cases).
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In hell they will bore you, in heaven you will bore them.
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An office party is not, as is sometimes supposed, the Managing Director's chance to kiss the tea-girl. It is the tea-girl's chance to kiss the Managing Director (however bizarre an ambition this may seem to anyone who has seen the Managing Director face on).
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It might be marvelous to be a man - then I could stop worrying about what's fair to women and just cheerfully assume I was superior, and that they had all been born to iron my shirts. Better still, I could be an Irish man - then I would have all the privileges of being male without giving up the right to be wayward, temperamental and an appealing minority.
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In our society mothers take the place elsewhere occupied by the Fates, the System, Negroes, Communism or Reactionary Imperialist Plots; mothers go on getting blamed until they're eighty, but shouldn't take it personally.
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Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing?
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a perfectly managed Christmas correct in every detail is, like basted inside seams and letters answered by return, a sure sign of someone who hasn't enough to do.
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The main purpose of children's parties is to remind you that there are children more awful than your own.
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The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.
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People get a bad impression of it [the English climate] by continually trying to treat it as if it was a bank clerk, who ought to be on time on Tuesday next, instead of philosophically seeing it as a painter, who may do anything so long as you don't try to predict what.
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Find out what you like doing best, and get someone to pay you for it.
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No nice men are good at getting taxis.
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A good marriage is like Dr Who's Tardis: small and banal from the outside but spacious and interesting from within.
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It would be nice to think that a censor could allow a genuine work of artistic seriousness and ban a titillating piece of sadism, but it would take a miracle to make such a distinction stick.
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As ridiculous to approve of property and let a few men have a grossly unfair share of it, as say you are all for marriage, and then let one man have all the wives.
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There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.
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Americans, indeed, often seem to be so overwhelmed by their children that they'll do anything for them except stay married to the co-producer.
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From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it.
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The wind of change, whatever it is, blows most freely through an open mind.
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It's a pity more men are not bastards by birth instead of vocation.
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Does anybody who gave up smoking to save a pound a week have a pound at the end of the week? Not on your life.
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Whereas a lot of men used to ask for conversation when they really wanted sex, nowadays they often feel obliged to ask for sex even when they really want conversation.
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As I look around the West End these days, it seems to me that outside every thin girl is a fat man, trying to get in.
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As anyone who has ever fallen foul of an airport, a conventional hospital or a bad restaurant knows, misery is made up of little things.
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And what would happen to my illusion that I am a force for order in the home if I wasn't married to the only man north of the Tiber who is even untidier than I am?
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The case against censoring anything is absolute: ... nothing that could be censored can be so bad in its effects, in the long run, as censorship itself.
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One reason you are stricken when your parents die is that the audience you've been aiming at all your life - shocking it, pleasing it - has suddenly left the theater.
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