Mark Twain Quotes About Sarcasm
-
Advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.
→ -
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.
→ -
I have witnessed and greatly enjoyed the first act of everything which Wagner created, but the effect on me has always been so powerful that one act was quite sufficient; whenever I have witnessed two acts I have gone away physically exhausted; and whenever I have ventured an entire opera the result has been the next thing to suicide.
→ -
Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.
→ -
Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
→ -
Out of the unconscious lips of babes and sucklings are we satirized.
→ -
When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.
→ -
Facts are stubborn, but statistics are more pliable.
→ -
I would like to live in Manchester, England. The transition between Manchester and death would be unnoticeable.
→ -
It is believed by everyone that when he was in heaven he was stern, hard, resentful, jealous and cruel, but that when he came down to earth, he became the opposite... sweet, gentle merciful, forgiving. He was a thousand billion times crueler than ever he was in the Old Testament... Meek and gentle? By and by we will examine that popular sarcasm by the light of the hell which he invented.
→ -
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
→ -
Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.
→ -
I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.
→ -
I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead.
→ -
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
→ -
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
→ -
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
→ -
I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I always feel that they have not said enough.
→ -
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
→ -
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
→ -
We have the best government that money can buy.
→ -
Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.
→ -
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children.
→ -
...Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel; at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable; and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm. Yet he blandly and in all sincerity calls himself the 'noblest work of God.'
→ -
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
→
Related Authors
-
Jules Verne Novelist -
F. Scott Fitzgerald Author -
William Faulkner Writer -
Arthur Conan Doyle Physician -
William Shakespeare Poet -
Albert Einstein Theoretical Physicist -
Edgar Allan Poe Author -
Robert Louis Stevenson Novelist -
Herman Melville Novelist -
Charles Dickens Writer -
George Orwell Novelist -
Ernest Hemingway Author -
Hal Holbrook Actor -
Oscar Wilde Writer -
Jane Austen Novelist -
Jack London Author -
Fyodor Dostoevsky Novelist -
Susy Clemens Literary critic -
Rudyard Kipling Writer -
Leo Tolstoy Writer