MaryJanice Davidson Quotes

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All quotes by MaryJanice Davidson: Writing more...
  • We have souls. Sure we do. Otherwise we'd do bad things all the time. You know, like politicians.

    Soul   Politician   Knows  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.130, Penguin
  • They weren't moving. Perhaps I was dazzling then with my ineptitude. It had happened before.

  • He snarled at me. "This isn't over yet, Betsy." "Excellent," I said. "I would also have accepted 'You haven't seen the last of me' and 'You'll regret this'.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2010). “Undead And Unappreciated: Number 3 in series”, p.144, Hachette UK
  • It never failed—I'd buy a new journal, write like a madwoman for ten pages, then lose total interest in the process. Three months later, I'd start the whole process all over again. I think I just liked buying new notebooks.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2006). “Undead and Unpopular: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.70, Penguin
  • Zombieland reference," Jon said, nodding. "How do you know that? That's a thousand-year-old reference!" I looked at laura. "I can't think of a single movie from a thousand years ago." "Uh...Betsy..." "Don't say it." You know how you don't know how stupid something is until you hear yourself say it? That happened to me a lot.

    Stupid   Thinking   Years  
  • Has anyone ever told you that you lack focus?

    Focus  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.97, Penguin
  • Did vampirism encourage Stockholm syndrome?

    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.60, Penguin
  • I zoomed in on the shoe department like a blonde homing pigeon. Shoes, shoes everywhere! Ah, sweet shoes. I truly think you can take the measure of a civilization by looking at its footwear.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unemployed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.26, Penguin
  • Majesty, I beg your forgiveness for the idignity you suffered and offer you the head of our enemy as—" "Put that thing down," I said impatiently. "I can't talk to you when you're shaking his head like a damned maraca.

    Enemy   Majesty   Said  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.225, Penguin
  • I've always assumed he'd be around to be, you know, yelled at and taken for granted. And of course I was wrong. Nobody's going to put up with that forever.

    Taken   Forever   Granted  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2005). “Undead and Unappreciated: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.204, Penguin
  • Wow, girlfriend, you're incompatible with life! And here I thought I was just incompatible with pink.

    Girlfriend   Wow  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.105, Penguin
  • The vampire bible, bound in human skin, written in blood, and full of prophecies that were never wrong. Trouble was, if you read the thing too long, it drove you nuts. Not "I'm having a bad day and feel bitchy" nuts or PMS nuts. "I think I'll commit felony assault on my friends and rape my boyfriend" nuts.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2006). “Undead and Unreturnable: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.30, Penguin
  • Fredrika Bimm, what do you think you're doing?" "Freaking out. Losing my mind. Thinking about snapping your husband's spine. Squashing the urge to vomit. Wishing I had died at childbirth." "Oh, you say that when you don't get a prize in your Lucky Charms.

  • Never, EVER give up. Not ever. Not EVER. Ever EVER!

  • Back off, boys. You don't want to mess with an out-of-work secretary. We're real testy.

    Real   Boys   Want  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.120, Penguin
  • You have attained maturity; display it for us, if you please.

    Maturity   Please   Ifs  
  • I've been stabbed before. Barely a week ago, in fact. AND I've been audited, AND I come from a broken home. In short - no offense, shorty - you don't scare me.

    Home   Broken   Scare  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.221, Penguin
  • ... friends are such a mixed blessing.

    Maggie Shayne, MaryJanice Davidson, Jacey Ford, Angela Knight (2009). “The Incredible Misadventures of Boo and the Boy Blunder: An Undead Novella A Penguin Group Special from Berkley Sensation”, p.21, Penguin
  • Elizabeth Anne Taylor April 25, 1974 - April 25, 2004 Our Sweetheart, Only resting

    MaryJanice Davidson (2006). “Undead and Unreturnable: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.19, Penguin
  • I walked in on my folks doing it doggy style less than four hours ago." "Waitress!" Jonas screamed, clicking his fingers madly. "Bring two!" then, more quietly,"You want a neck massage? A bedtime story? A bullet in the ear?

    Two   Style   Massage  
  • I've got a folder full of rejection slips that I keep. Know why? Because those same editors are now calling my agent hoping I'll write a book or novella for them. Things change. A rejection slip today might mean a frantic call to your agent in six months.

    Book   Writing   Mean  
  • I trudged around on the muddy river bottom for half an hour, patiently waiting to drown, before giving up and slogging my way back to shore.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unwed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.24, Penguin
  • Here I am, just wandering down a deserted street in the middle of the night. I hope I don't run into any trouble. Goodness, that would just ruin my whole evening." I strolled and hummed, trying to project Innocent Victim.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2010). “Undead And Unwed: Number 1 in series”, p.183, Hachette UK
  • Take your hands off her, Sinclair told the guy behind me, Or they'll write books about what I'll do to you.

    Book   Writing   Hands  
  • Interesting shade #23 Lush Golden Blonde highlights. Heyyyyyy.... The woman in the awful suit was me! The woman in the cheap shoes was me!

  • I was so furious I was actually dizzy with it. There were so many bitchy, sarcastic observations to make, I was having a sarcasm stroke. "My God! You people! You're - you're so stupid you're making my eyeballs throb. They're throbbing, dammit!

    MaryJanice Davidson (2010). “Undead and Unfinished: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.114, Penguin
  • Can you burn me up with holy water? Poke me to death with your crucifix? Pelt me with communion wafers?

    Water   Holy   Communion  
  • It's inappropriate for the queen of the dead to be afraid of ghosts.

    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unemployed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.134, Penguin
  • He said my name the way diabetics talked about hot fudge sundaes.

    Names   Hot   Fudge  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2004). “Undead and Unemployed: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.42, Penguin
  • My my Laura Goodman. I must say that is a charming name for a charming young lady." "Eric's old." I broke in. "Really really old." "Er— really?" Laura asked. "Gosh you don't look even out of your thirties." "Tons of face-lifts. He's a surgical addict. I'm trying to get him help." I added defensively when they both gave me strange looks.

    Names   Trying   Eric  
    MaryJanice Davidson (2005). “Undead and Unappreciated: A Queen Betsy Novel”, p.155, Penguin
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MaryJanice Davidson quotes about: Writing