Penn Jillette Quotes

On this page you can find the TOP of Penn Jillette's best quotes! We hope you will find some sayings from Illusionist Penn Jillette's in our collection, which will inspire you to new achievements! There are currently 254 quotes on this page collected since March 5, 1955! Share our collection of quotes with your friends on social media so that they can find something to inspire them!
  • Comedy is taken care of by a free market.

    Taken   Care   Comedy  
    "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I don't believe the majority always knows what's best for everyone.

    "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • It's amazing to me how many people think that voting to have the government give poor people money is compassion. Helping poor and suffering people yourself is compassion. Voting for our government to use guns to give money to help poor and suffering people is immoral, self-righteous, bullying laziness.

    Bullying   Gun   Thinking  
    Penn Jillette (2012). “God, No!: Signs You May Already Be an Atheist and Other Magical Tales”, p.151, Simon and Schuster
  • If the bible were published as fiction, no reviewer would give it a passing grade. There are some vivid scenes and quotable phrases but there's no plot, no structure, a tremendous amount of filler and the characters are painfully one dimensional. Whatever you do, don't read the bible for a moral code. It advocates prejudice, cruelty, superstition and murder. Read it because we need more atheists.

  • Bob Barr is not crazy enough for my taste.

    Crazy   Bob   Taste  
    "Penn Jillette on Election 2008". Interview With David Weigel, reason.com. November 3, 2008.
  • If there's something you really want to believe, that's what you should question the most.

    Believe   Want   Should  
    "How My B.S. Detector Works" by Penn Jillette, bigthink.com. 2017.
  • A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a failure.'

    Laughing   Way   Ends  
    "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • We have to fight for the freedom to be stupid, and smoking is one of the best ways to fight for your freedom, to be just as stupid as you can be.

    "The Situation" with Monica Crowley, www.nbcnews.com. August 17, 2005.
  • My whole family is missing that sports gene. I hope I didn't screw that up by marrying a great golfer.

    Sports   Missing   Genes  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I'm a big fan of huge populations of people, so you'd think with 300 million people in the country, you don't even have to please 1% to be phenomenally successful.

    Interview with Ken P., www.ign.com. October 13, 2003.
  • If you want to turn out an atheist child, unconditional love constantly is a good way to do it.

    "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • Cars mean nothing to me. I'm not a car guy.

    Mean   Car   Guy  
    "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • TV networks are dying. The death throes of religion give us jihads. The death throes of television give us reality shows.

    Reality   Giving   Dying  
    Penn Jillette (2012). “Every Day Is an Atheist Holiday!: More Magical Tales from the Bestselling Author of God, No!”, p.27, Penguin
  • This is going to sound horrible, but I don't even know how much I make in a year. It must be, you know, a couple of million dollars, a few million. I know it's more money than my dad, a jail guard, made in his lifetime; more money than I'll ever need.

    Couple   Dad   Years  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I don't think anything gives your life joy and meaning. I think your life simply has joy and meaning. The love for my children, the love for my parents and the love for my friends is the end in itself. The meaning is life.

  • My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.

    "Thoughts On the Business of Life". "Forbes" Magazine, November 12, 2007.
  • As I’m fond of saying, if you want to find utopia, take a sharp right on money and a sharp left on sex and it’s straight ahead.

    Sex   Want   Utopia  
    "Obama Same as Bush" by Patrick Gavin, www.politico.com. June 18, 2010.
  • The fact that the majority wants something good does not give them the right to use force on the minority that don't want to pay for it. If you have to use a gun, it's not really a very good idea. Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up on the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid.

    Kids   Gun   Rights  
    Penn Jillette (2012). “God, No!: Signs You May Already Be an Atheist and Other Magical Tales”, p.151, Simon and Schuster
  • My whole take on libertarianism is simply that I don't know what's best for other people.

  • America was founded on Christians not trusting each other, and they sometimes seemed more willing to reach out to the godless than to someone from another sect.

    "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I do believe that a belief in God is crazy, but that doesn't mean that the people who believe in it are crazy. Those are two different things. Ideas can be stupid and crazy, and the people who hold those ideas are not necessarily stupid and crazy.

    Stupid   Crazy   Believe  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • Every nut who kills people has a Bible lying around. If you're looking for violent rape imagery, the Bible's right there in your hotel room. If you just want to look up ways to screw people up, there it is, and you're justified because God told you to.

    Lying   Nuts   People  
    "Voodoo and Violence". Interview with Steve Kurtz, reason.com. April 1994.
  • Read everything and be kind.

    Be Kind   Kind  
  • Teller and I worked Renaissance Festivals and street performing - actually more real, no kidding around, Philadelphia street performing than we did Renaissance Festivals.

    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • All David Blaine is is a good-looking magician.

    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I had e-mail in 1984! I had an e-mail address then, which means that all you could write to was Steve Jobs and Bill Gates. There were three of us, writing to each other.

    Jobs   Mean   Writing  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • You don’t have to be brave or a saint, a martyr, or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is “I don’t know”.

    Atheist   Smart   Brave  
    Penn Jillette (2012). “God, No!: Signs You May Already Be an Atheist and Other Magical Tales”, p.13, Simon and Schuster
  • I'm not greedy. I have love, blue skies, rainbows and Hallmark cards and that has to be enough. It has to be enough, but it's everything in the world and everything in the world is plenty for me. It seems just rude to beg the invisible for more.

    Blue   Sky   Rude  
    "There Is No God". "This I Believe" with Renee Montagne, www.npr.org. November 21, 2005.
  • World War II proves there's no God.

    War   World   Prove  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
  • I love when violent, dangerous art is done by people who are not violent and dangerous. I love that when George Romero was making 'Dawn of the Dead,' he was coaching his son's little league team.

    Art   Team   Son  
    "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.
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  • We hope you have found the saying you were looking for in our collection! At the moment, we have collected 254 quotes from the Illusionist Penn Jillette, starting from March 5, 1955! We periodically replenish our collection so that visitors of our website can always find inspirational quotes by authors from all over the world! Come back to us again!