Funny Holiday Quotes
The best sayings about Funny Holiday that you can share on Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook and other social networks!
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Unless we make Christmas an occasion to share our blessings, all the snow in Alaska won't make it 'white'.
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A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell.
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There is a remarkable breakdown of taste and intelligence at Christmastime. Mature, responsible grown men wear neckties made of holly leaves and drink alcoholic beverages with raw egg yolks and cottage cheese in them.
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To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To you, respect.
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Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
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Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year.
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Christmas gift suggestions: To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance.
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That's the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.
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Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.
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I have had a holiday, and I'd like to take it up professionally.
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Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks.
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The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
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I like to compare the holiday season with the way a child listens to a favorite story. The pleasure is in the familiar way the story begins, the anticipation of familiar turns it takes, the familiar moments of suspense, and the familiar climax and ending.
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Christmas is the day that holds all time together.
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When we were children we were grateful to those who filled our stockings at Christmas time. Why are we not grateful to God for filling our stockings with legs?
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I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.
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Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings.
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Why are we not grateful to God for filling our stockings with legs?
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Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year.
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Love the giver more than the gift.
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As we struggle with shopping lists and invitations, compounded by December's bad weather, it is good to be reminded that there are people in our lives who are worth this aggravation, and people to whom we are worth the same.
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
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Christmas is doing a little something extra for someone.
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I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
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Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
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There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.
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One thing I learned from drinking is that if you ever go Christmas caroling, you should go with a group of people. And also go in mid-December.
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To many people holidays are not voyages of discovery, but a ritual of reassurance.
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I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
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Top Authors
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Andrew Johnson 17th U.S. President -
Andrew Rannells Actor -
Alison Brie Actress -
Alison Elliott Actress -
Alyssa-Jane Cook Actress -
Amy Acker Actress -
Amitav Ghosh Author -
Alonzo Bodden Comedian -
Alice Rivlin Former Director of the Office of Management and Budget -
Allan Nevins Historian -
Andre Sainte-Lague Mathematician -
Andrew van der Bijl Missionary -
Alvin Plantinga Philosopher -
Allan McLeod Cormack Physicist -
Alice Oswald Poet -
Alison Croggon Poet -
Allen Grossman Poet -
Allan Gregg Pollster -
Allan Snyder Researcher -
Ally McCoist Soccer player -
Alistair Cockburn Software developer -
Ally Hilfiger Television producer
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Alice McDermott Writer -
Andre Bjerke Writer -
Andrew D. Chumbley Writer
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