Funny Smoking Quotes
The best sayings about Funny Smoking that you can share on Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook and other social networks!
-
I used to smoke two packs a day and I just hate being a nonsmoker.... but I will never consider myself a nonsmoker because I always find smokers the most interesting people at the table.
→ -
I now have absolute proof that smoking even one marijuana cigarette is equal in brain damage to being on Bikini Island during an H-bomb blast
→ -
Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.
→ -
People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them....well it's killing me!
→ -
You must have a cigarette. A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want?
→ -
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.
→ -
I thought I couldn't afford to take her out and smoke as well. So I gave up cigarettes. Then I took her out and one day I looked at her and thought: 'Oh well,' and I went back to smoking again, and that was better.
→ -
If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
→ -
A cigar has "...a fire at one end and a fool at the other."
→ -
There's something luxurious about having a girl light your cigarette. In fact, I got married once on account of that.
→ -
There are some circles in America where it seems to be more socially acceptable to carry a hand-gun than a packet of cigarettes.
→ -
I want all hellions to quit puffing that hell fume in God's clean air.
→ -
I'm glad I don't have to explain to a man from Mars why each day I set fire to dozens of little pieces of paper, and then put them in my mouth.
→ -
For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward.
→ -
A cigarette is the only consumer product which when used as directed kills its consumer.
→ -
I DON'T smoke anymore, except on National No Smoking Day as a protest against those who want to control our lives.
→ -
If an addict who has been completely cured starts smoking again he no longer experiences the discomfort of his first addiction. There exists, therefore, outside alkaloids and habit, a sense for opium, an intangible habit which lives on, despite the recasting of the organism. The dead drug leaves a ghost behind. At certain hours it haunts the house.
→ -
Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.
→ -
Nicotine patches are great. Stick one over each eye and you can't find your fags.
→ -
I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.
→ -
Smoking is one of the leading causes of all statistics.
→ -
The believing we do something when we do nothing is the first illusion of tobacco.
→ -
The public health authorities never mention the main reason many Americans have for smoking heavily, which is that smoking is a fairly sure, fairly honorable form of suicide.
→ -
I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
→ -
There's a lot of people who, a cigarette is about the only vacation they have.
→ -
Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
→ -
aven, I have given up smoking again!... God! I feel fit. Homicidal, but fit. A different man. Irritable, moody, depressed, rude, nervy, perhaps; but the lungs are fine.
→ -
The dead drug leaves a ghost behind. At certain hours it haunts the house.
→ -
Oscar Wilde: 'Do you mind if I smoke?' Sarah Bernhardt: 'I don't care if you burn.'
→ -
Ods me I marle what pleasure or felicity they have in taking their roguish tobacco. It is good for nothing but to choke a man, and fill him full of smoke and embers.
→
Share our collection of quotes on social networks – this will allow as many people as possible to find inspiring quotes about Funny Smoking!