Douglas Adams Quotes
-
One day old Thrashbarg said that Almighty Bob had declared that he, Thrashbarg, was to have first pick of the sandwiches. The villagers asked him when this had happened, exactly, and Thrashbarg said it had happened yesterday, when they weren't looking. 'Have faith,' Old Thrashbarg said, 'or burn!' They let him have first pick of the sandwiches. It seemed easiest.
→ -
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is.
→ -
Dirk turned on the car wipers, which grumbled because they didn't have quite enough rain to wipe away, so he turned them off again. Rain quickly speckled the windscreen. He turned on the wipers again, but they still refused to feel that the exercise was worthwhile, and scraped and squeaked in protest.
→ -
Fiordland, a vast tract of mountainous terrain that occupies the south-west corner of South Island, New Zealand, is one of the most astounding pieces of land anywhere on God's earth, and one's first impulse, standing on a cliff top surveying it all, is simply to burst into spontaneous applause.
→ -
Being offended by things is the world's big hobby at the moment. It's almost taken over from wearing goatee beards.
→ -
Exactly!" said Deep Thought. "So once you do know what the question actually is, you'll know what the answer means.
→ -
I only know as much about myself as my mind can work out under its current conditions. And its current conditions are not good.
→ -
The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognize each other and immediately pretend they haven t. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognizing each other the whole length of the corridor.
→ -
I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day.
→ -
There is a piece of me that likes to fondly imagine my maverick and rebellious nature, but, more accurately, I like to have a nice and cosy institution that I can rub up against a little bit.
→ -
He picked up the letter Q and hurled it into a distant privet bush where it hit a young rabbit. The rabbit hurtled off in terror and didn’t stop till it was set upon and eaten by a fox which choked on one of its bones and died on the bank of a stream which subsequently washed it away. During the following weeks Ford Perfect swallowed his pride and struck up a relationship with a girl who had been a personnel officer on Golgafrincham, and he was terribly upset when she suddenly passed away as a result of drinking water from a pool that had been polluted by the body of a dead fox.
→ -
Yes it is,' said the Professor. 'Wait—' he motioned to Richard, who was about to go out again and investigate— 'let it be. It won't be long.' Richard stared in disbelief. 'You say there's a horse in your bathroom, and all you can do is stand there naming Beatles songs?' The Professor looked blankly at him.
→ -
"I think we have different value systems." "Well, mine's better."
→ -
We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!
→ -
Time doesn't necessarily happen in chronological order.
→ -
These creatures you call mice, you see, they are not quite as they appear. They are merely the protrusion into our dimension of vastly hyperintelligent pandimensional beings.
→ -
The Hitch Hiker's Guide has not been an opera. It has however been a tapestry, if you count a woven bath towel as a tapestry.
→ -
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
→ -
I teleported home last night with Ron and Sid and Meg Ron stole Meggy's heart away and I got Sidney's leg.
→ -
The bird that would soar above the plain of tradition and prejudice must have strong wings.
→ -
I wrote an ad for Apple Computer: "Macintosh - We might not get everything right, but at least we knew the century was going to end".
→ -
The longest and most destructive party ever held is now into its fourth generation and still no one shows any signs of leaving. The problem of when the drink is going to run out is, however, going to have to be faced one day. The planet over which they are floating is no longer the planet it was when they first started floating over it. It is in bad shape
→ -
The world is a thing of utter inordinate complexity and richness and strangeness that is absolutely awesome. I mean the idea that such complexity can arise not only out of such simplicity, but probably absolutely out of nothing, is the most fabulous extraordinary idea. And once you get some kind of inkling of how that might have happened ' it's just wonderful. And . . . the opportunity to spend 70 or 80 years of your life in such a universe is time well spent as far as I am concerned.
→ -
The kakapo is an extremely fat bird. A good-sized adult will weigh about six or seven pounds, and its wings are just about good for waggling a bit if it thinks it's about to trip over something - but flying is out of the question. Sadly, however, it seems that not only has the kakapo forgotten how to fly, but it has forgotten that it has forgotten how to fly. Apparently a seriously worried kakapo will sometimes run up a tree and jump out of it, whereupon it flies like a brick and lands in a graceless heap on the ground.
→ -
Did I do anything wrong today," he said, "or has the world always been like this and I've been too wrapped up in myself to notice?
→ -
Any man who can hitch the length and breadth of the galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still know where his towel is is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
→ -
Only by counting could humans demonstrate their independence of computers.
→ -
There is a feeling which persists in England that making a sandwich interesting, attractive, or in any way pleasant to eat is something sinful that only foreigners do.
→ -
You may not instantly see why I bring the subject up, but that is because my mind works so phenomenally fast, and I am at a rough estimate thirty billion times more intelligent than you. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number.” “Er, five,” said the mattress. “Wrong,” said Marvin. “You see?
→ -
He sniggered. He didn't like to think of himself as the sort of person who giggled or sniggered, but he had to admit that he had been giggling and sniggering almost continuously for well over half an hour now.
→
Related Authors
-
Isaac Asimov Author -
Stephen Fry Comedian -
Richard Adams Novelist -
Eoin Colfer Author -
Diane Setterfield Author -
Richard Dawkins Ethologist -
Philip Pullman Film writer -
Neil Gaiman Author -
P. G. Wodehouse Writer -
Arthur C. Clarke Film writer -
Kurt Vonnegut Writer -
Stephen King Author -
Terry Jones Comedian -
Jane Austen Novelist -
Terry Pratchett Author -
George Eliot Novelist -
Mark Carwardine Columnist -
Aldous Huxley Writer -
Ray Bradbury Writer