Yakov Smirnoff Quotes
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Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
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Never having alone time is real tough on people.
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Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
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I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good.
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I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
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My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love.
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When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
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In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
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Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling.
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A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original.
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In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job!
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It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
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I fed my ego, but not my soul.
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Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year.
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I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
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If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
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I was a comedian in Russia, and I worked on the cruise ships there. I met a lot of Americans, and they were laughing even though I didn't speak their language.
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In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete.
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I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to.
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In Soviet Russia, party always finds you!
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I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
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After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.
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If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.
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Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there.
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In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
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In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you!
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In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads; this is the reason we stop laughing.
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The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington.
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I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
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Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
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